Unified Field Theory of Conspiracy Theories

I want to propose a unified field theory of conspiracy theories. Look all us conspiracy theorists know that there is a one world government of 12 people who control anything and everything. We’re just not sure how it works. Well let me dish it out for you guys.

Okay it’s quite obvious that the Fed, you know the Federal Reserve, is not actually controlled by Ben Bernanke. It’s actually controlled by 2 reptilian aliens who clearly control the 10 humans responsible for the 9/11 attacks. These 10 humans and 2 reptilians pretty much explain the Fed take over of the banking system and soon to be our national healthcare. Anyway, the damage has already been done. The Reptilians have everyone confused actually. People who believe that the grey aliens are from Zeta Reticuli are actually confused. There are no grey aliens. These seemingly peaceful grey aliens are actually reptilian aliens in disguise sent to make sure that we never return to the gold standard. Because if we ever return to the gold standard our currency could no longer be manipulated by the evil reptilian Federal Reserve aliens.

What A Reptilian Disguised As A Human Might Appear Like

Look a lot of people think that the aliens arrived on our planet back in 1947 during what is called the Roswell crash. Reptilian aliens were actually discovered there but this has come to be a massive distraction from the real attack. In 1941 the supposed Japanese military attacked Pearl Harbor. Unbeknownst to everyone except for the Majestic 12 (which are some of the same people who now control the Fed), it was actually the Reptilian aliens. The confusion is that the Reptilians come from outer space. Unfortunately this could be no further from the truth since they reside in the hollow earth!

The hollow earth explains why NASA is continuously always trying to distract us from our own planet when it keeps focusing on Mars. The more you focus on other planets the less attention you pay to your own and how obvious it is that there are two openings at the North and the South pole into our own planet! It’s funny that NASA now wants us to pay attention to Mars so much when it was just 90 years ago that Mars actually used to be a planet teaming with life that was Eden like. Look at the facts: astronomers were observing what appeared to be canal like structures on the planet and this led them to believe that there was life. Well, there actually was! That was until the Reptilians discovered it just in time to be able to obliterate the peaceful life that once lived there. No one knows for sure what kind of life was on there. I guess we’ll never know. Some suspect that life might exist in the hollow of Mars. I myself suspect that the “face on Mars” is actually one of the Martians’ last monuments right before they were destroyed. The reason I suspect this is because the face on Mars looks sad. I think the monument’s sadness reflects their sadness.

Speaking of NASA distracting us, the whole faked moon landing situation can be entirely explained by the fact that NASA did not want the Russians to actually go to the moon. They wanted the Russians to think we beat them and thus decrease their morale. And do you know why that would be the case? They didn’t want the Russians to discover that the Earth had two openings to the hollow of it at the North and South poles. These openings are so big that they can be seen from the vantage point of the moon! The reason why the Russians can be trusted to give out the truth is that Russia has a colder climate than the United States. Reptilians living on the inside of the Earth are only exposed to the warm air trapped inside the hollow earth thus Reptilians cannot stand the cold Russian climate. Thus Russia is not infiltrated by Reptilians. But this may soon change once global warming (which specifically is caused by the Reptilians) warms up Russia enough for the Reptilians to live there. <–I did not steal this idea from the movie The Arrival by the way. You know, The Arrival, that really cool movie starring the best actor ever Charlie Sheen.

Anyway, the reptilian controlled Fed is just inches away from controlling our healthcare. But most importantly, the reptilian controlled Fed has already infiltrated our lives by using the North American Union outlined in NAFTA. This North American Union and its sister the European Union will control the mass of people and sooner or later grow into a one world government under the auspice of the UN. This is happening as we speak. I am not lying. I’d identify who these people are but I surely would be killed.

I submit to you this unifying field theory of conspiracy theories. I hope you believe me and I hope you pass this information on as soon as possible because I might not be alive for much longer. NASA agents are already following me to my car and harassing me.

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